From Psalm 37: “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him…” The doctor added a new drug to the chemo I am taking and it is not much fun. Blurry mind, aching bones, and sleepless nights have become the norm. The word I keep hearing is: “Wait on the Lord.” I talked to a close friend who is not unfamiliar with suffering: “I think I am waiting on the Lord, but what am I waiting for?” My friend’s answer holds a joyful truth: “Waiting on the Lord means… having the Lord, Himself. That is what we all really want.”
Of course I argue that I really want something else: less pain, a clear mind, a good night’s sleep… But an all-loving Father says, “Taste and see that I am good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Me.” I recently ran across this poem by Russell Kelfer:
WAIT
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and wept for a clue to my fate…
And the Master so gently said, “Wait.”“Wait? You say wait?” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is Your hand shortened? Or have You not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I’m claiming Your Word.“My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and You tell me to ‘Wait?’
I’m needing a ‘yes,’ a go-ahead sign.
Or even a ‘no,’ to which I’ll resign.“You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:
I’m weary of asking! I need a reply.”Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied again, “Wait.”
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, “So I’m waiting… for what?”He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine…
And He tenderly said, “I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.“I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You’d have what you want, but you wouldn’t know Me.
You’d not know the depth of My love for each saint.
You’d not know the power that I give to the faint.“You’d not learn to see through clouds of despair.
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there.
You’d not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence are all you can see.“You’d never experience the fullness of love
When the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and save, for a start,
But you’d not know the depth of the love of My heart.“The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.“You’d never know should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that ‘My grace is sufficient for thee.’
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if I lost what I’m doing in you.“So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to truly know Me.
And though oft’ My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, ‘Wait.’”
“I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.” Psalm 40:1-2