First, I would like to thank everyone for encouragement and prayer. I don’t know how it works, but somehow I think God lets every prayer and every kind word be a part of His tender goodness. The doctor outlined the plan we expected last week saying we would start treatment the upcoming weekend. The urgency hinged on the fact that my red blood count and platelet count were extremely low the previous week. As we closed our meeting, the doctor walked with me to the room where my blood is tested. “Maybe your counts will be up,” he said. “If they are, I don’t need to start chemo, right?” I asked. “I wouldn’t count on them being up,” he replied. Well, both counts were up and though the high protein still keeps me in a similar status, I received a few more days of freedom. We agreed that if the protein does not drop in the next couple of weeks we should start treatment. Your prayers are treasured!
On the way to this appointment I was reminded, in a stinging way, of one of the purposes of the bountiful grace of God. I had just filled up my car with gas (a painful experience these days) and was driving out of the parking lot when a man a few years younger than me yelled, “Can I ask you a question?” Pretty confident he intended to ask me for money and knowing I was on my way to an important meeting, I simply waved and shouted, “I’ve got to go!” As I drove out on the main road it hit me what I had just done. Here I was, knowing that I am coming to the end of normal life, turning away from a person who may have been in need. Only fifteen minutes earlier I had just thanked God for His abundant grace and now I was refusing grace to another. I didn’t even take the time to hear the guy’s question because in my mind I had judged his intentions. I drove a block and turned around, but of course the man was no where to be found.
How could one who has been given so much squander an opportunity to help another? God pours His grace on us that we might offer His grace to others. To love others as Jesus loves us is the greatest thing we can do on this earth. Brennan Manning, author of A RAGAMUFFIN GOSPEL, reminds us of the extravagant lives Jesus calls us to live:
As Christians living in the Spirit, we’re called to pass on the tenderness of God. The parameters of our compassion extend beyond those who opt for our lifestyle, favor our existence, or make us feel good. Charges of elitism are dropped for the lack of evidence. Peace and reconciliation for all, without exception – even for moral failures – is the radical lifestyle of Christians living in the wisdom of accepted tenderness. We may be called friends of tax-collectors and sinners – but only because we are (or should be). We understand that we’re in the company of some rather honorable people; in fact, we’re in the company of Jesus himself. According to the gospel, it’s unrestrained tenderness and limitless compassion that stamp our relationship with the Father of Jesus as belonging to the order of the Really Real. (from THE WISDOM OF TENDERNESS)
“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.” John 15:12
) I can still make a case for health as I look in the mirror and as I continue to work every day, but soon I could be accused of being in denial. As much as I hate it, I must eventually do something. Denial of sin is much more common than denial of disease. Paul explains in his letter to the Romans that God gave the Law to make denial more difficult. “The Law was added so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more…”