Dana's Christian Journey

musings of a thankful cancer survivor

Author: Dana

  • good news

    Early in His ministry, Jesus was almost thrown off a cliff by citizens of his hometown. He had just read this passage from the book of Isaiah: “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight to the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” With all eyes fixed on Him, Jesus gave the scroll back to the attendant and said, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.” At first, everyone was amazed and spoke well of Joseph’s son. But after Jesus made a few comments, the people became furious and drove him out of town. (see Luke 4:14-30)

    How could the messenger of good news be treated so poorly? Jesus knew what was going on in the hearts of the people and he told them the truth. “You have heard I’ve done miracles in Capernaum, but you’re not going to accept me here. I tell you, God sometimes bypasses those you would think He favors. Don’t assume that just because you were born in a certain land that you are better than someone else.”

    I’ve thought a lot about good news lately, as I’ve been through another barrage of tests. When you have cancer, good news is a cherished prize. The truth is, on this earth, we all have to deal with something far worse than cancer. As descendants of Adam, we’ve all been infected by a disease that separates us from our Father and leaves us without hope. For this reason, God sent His Son and the message of good news. Through His blood, we have forgiveness of sins. Through Jesus, we can be freed from sin. By His grace, we are given a new heart and the blessing of the Holy Spirit. But I wonder if the Nazareth mindset is still around.

    Perhaps those who listened to Jesus in the synagogue were not poor or blind or oppressed or imprisoned. Maybe they possessed everything and did not need a Messiah to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor. I shared about Jesus in another private school in the city of Atlanta a couple of years ago. This was not a Christian school, but a friend of mine taught a religion class and asked that I be the spokesman for Christianity. I felt privileged to tell these kids from all backgrounds about Jesus, His teaching, and His sacrifice. My friend always reserved time for questions at the end of the class. I’ll never forget what one young man said: “I’ve read about this Jesus you’ve talked about. He was one radical dude. So you guys that call yourselves Christians – why do most of you live out in the suburbs, far away from the problems in the city? I thought Jesus hung out with the poor. How do you justify having so much, when there are so many people in need? Why don’t you guys live the radical life your leader did?” I kind of wanted to take that kid out and throw him off a cliff, but I didn’t. I didn’t even try to defend myself. “I think you’ve asked a good question. In fact, I think Jesus might be asking us the same thing.”

    This is the truth: we’re all in need. The “problem worse than cancer” entangles us, blinds us, and puffs us up. I need to be poor in spirit; I need to hunger and thirst; I need to weep. When my pride is knocked back and I see the truth, I’ll dare not judge another. I’ll show mercy and love peace. When, by faith, I receive a new spirit, my heart will be pure and I’ll see God. That’s good news.

  • generations

    I’m teaching a U.S. History class this year, a subject I’ve always loved. Lately, I’ve considered the moral challenges that confront each generation. The “Roaring 20’s” brought an alarming increase in immodesty in American society. There was also great debate about alcohol use in our country. In fact, in 1919, the Eighteenth Amendment banned the production, sale, or import of alcoholic beverages. In 1925, a highly publicized trial pitted Bible-believing, William Jennings Bryan, against Clarence Darrow, who argued that his client should be allowed to teach evolution. The Scopes “Monkey” Trial in Dayton, Tennessee was the first trial ever broadcast over American radio.

    A generation later came the “baby boomers”. I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s, a tumultuous time where rebellion seemed to explode across the land. “Sex, Drugs, and Rock ‘n Roll” was the theme of young people in search for the meaning of life. The thought of “free love” was promoted as musicians sang such lines as: “If you can’t be with the one you love, then love the one you’re with…” Of course, “free love” has led to more disease, brokenness, and pain than anyone could have ever predicted. The devil doesn’t usually advertise the result of his lies. In 1962, the Supreme Court ruled that it was unconstitutional to lead public prayer in public schools.

    The kids I teach are growing up in the 2000’s. They’ve seen their share of Court rulings about God’s name. Drugs and alcohol are still around, and the world’s teaching about sexuality has grown cloudier and cloudier with the prominent theme being that “nothing is wrong.” I don’t think it’s an easy time to be a teenager.

    So where is the hope?

    The hope for today is the same as the hope for one who grew up in the 60’s, or the 20’s, or any generation – Jesus. He says, “If the whole world becomes immodest, you keep your eyes on Me and obey Me and I’ll take care of you. If the whole world gets high and says ‘free love’ is the way to go, you listen to Me and believe that I am the way. If the whole world says any lifestyle is OK and you should simply do as you please, trust that I know what will bring you true happiness and follow Me. If the whole world says that I don’t exist, remember the fool has said in his heart there is no God. Don’t listen to fools.”

    To those of any generation who believe in Him, Jesus says: “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth and the truth shall set you free.” John 8:31-32

    And to those of any generation who reject Him (even those who claim to know God), Jesus says: “If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and am now here. I have not come on my own; but he sent me. Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say. You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desire. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:42-44

  • judgment

    I went to the airport to pick up a friend this week. There always seems to be a microcosm of the world in this part of Atlanta as friends, loved ones, and business associates anticipate the arrival of a traveler. All ages, colors, and nationalities travel up the long escalator to the main part of the airport. I think the lady to my right was from Russia. Next to her, a little girl talked excitedly to her father. I’m pretty sure they spoke French. The people to my left spoke Spanish. A young man who works at a sandwich shop near our school was there to pick up someone. We recognized each other and shook hands. I believe he is from India. Two little Korean girls squealed with glee as they saw their father appear at the top of the escalator. The man stooped down and hugged his daughters, then hugged his wife. Sweethearts ran to meet one another, friends embraced, and business men and women received instructions. I even saw ex-Chicago Bull Scotty Pippen emerge from the crowd.

    I sometimes think about the judgment when I’m standing in that place. I’m sure God will have a better system than an escalator to bring each person before Him, but there will be quite a picture of diversity. He’ll judge every one of the billions of people that have ever lived with a perfect judgment. Those of us who had moms who could look right through us and almost know exactly what we were thinking have a tiny understanding of what each of us will experience. God will look us in the eye and we will know in an instant that He knows every single thing about us. We will also know, regardless of what we believed while we walked the earth, that there is an all-powerful Creator who is the definition of love. No human argument of evolution will be made on judgment day, and every knee will bow to the King of Kings.

    Paul writes that the only way we can be prepared for this day is to be clothed in Christ. By faith we receive this gift of righteousness; by grace we are saved. The parables of Jesus reveal that what we do on this earth is going to be carefully examined. Many will not be able to enter the Kingdom because they rejected the Son. “I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.” These will argue with the King, “Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?” Then Jesus will give a disturbing answer, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for the least of these, you did not do for me.”

    Those who are welcomed into the Kingdom prepared “since the creation of the world” will also be surprised by the words of Jesus. When commended by the King, the righteous will answer, “Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or need clothing and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?” And Jesus will reply, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.”

    The friend I picked up at the airport lives in Africa. He and his wife are running a school for children who have been deeply impacted by the AIDS crisis on that continent. I’ve seen the missionaries bathe these little kids and give them food and medicine. I’ve seen the smiles of these children after receiving wonderful love from the family of God. Jesus says that when these little ones are served, He is being served. I think He is all around us.

    “We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.” II Corinthians 5:7-10

  • Good Shepherd

    Taylor called Saturday from Cambodia. This is the first time we have talked to him since he reached Asia. While his voice sounded strong to me, he has been sick quite a bit of the time. So what do you say to a child on the opposite end of the earth when things are rough? We can pray, but there doesn’t seem much else to do.

    I did e-mail Taylor some things we all need to remember about our Good Shepherd. “The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love.” If, indeed, I am just a sheep trying to follow His voice, then I can be confident of a couple of things. First, He goes ahead of us. Jesus faces the danger before we do. Whether it is a rocky road, a wild animal, or a fierce storm, the Shepherd meets the difficulty before the sheep does. We can persevere because He perseveres. We walk in hope, because He is our hope. Isn’t this true?

    We can also have great confidence in His wisdom and the choices He makes for our lives. The Good Shepherd will not take the sheep down a path they cannot travel. So if we find ourselves on a difficult road, God knows we can make it. “If were too hard, He would not take me this way.” As a lowly sheep, that’s what I believe. Oh to trust the Shepherd!

    Of course, I can’t tell my son anything I’m not willing to embrace myself. Many of you know we’ve gotten some great news regarding my health. Just a trace of the cancer is found in my blood now, which means I’ve not had chemo since before Christmas. While this protein count is basically immeasurable, it seems wise to harvest stem cells in case a future transplant is needed. From beginning to end, this will be a three to four week process that is not too unpleasant. As a dumb sheep, I often reason with the Good Shepherd that the ‘path of the stem cell transplant’ is far too dangerous a journey… but we’ll trust He knows best 🙂 I hope to go through this next step soon and then forget about disease for a while. Please accept our thanks for your prayers. Somehow the Good Shepherd lets our prayers be a part of His mysterious ways, and we are so grateful for the many people who remember us. May we all rejoice that “we are His people, the sheep of His pasture.”

    “When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger’s voice… I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for his sheep… I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me – just as the Father knows me and I know the Father – and I lay down my life for the sheep. I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd… My sheep listen to my voice; I know them and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” John 10:1-30

  • family dilemma

    I guess “to be like Jesus” is a common goal of the Christian, but how does it happen? Goal setting and human effort do not bring what is needed in God’s eyes. But He will work in those who are willing to trust Him. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast.” God knows our prideful nature so well. He lets His perfect law show us we can never be righteous in His eyes by following rules. A new and clean heart is what we need… and that’s why we need a Savior.

    But if we put our faith fully in Jesus and receive this gift of righteousness that Paul writes about, we are still challenged to live like Him. Becoming like Jesus is more God’s idea than our own and if we have this deep desire, we can know His Spirit is at work in our hearts. “When we walk with the Lord in the light of His Word, what a glory He sheds on our way! While we do His good will, He abides with us still, and with all who will trust and obey.” Giving up self, listening to our King, and trusting Him fully are the ways we progress on this journey. We obey the Lord because we love Him, and when we fail to obey we are sad because we know that His obedience saved us. How we need His grace.

    So here’s a rather lengthy Hawaiian story that reminds me of my desperate need, God’s constant love, and Jesus’ radical instructions on how to live.

    The Wednesday before Christmas, Taylor wanted to show us a beautiful place he found on the island, so our whole family hopped in the car Susan rented and drove toward the ocean. Taylor said we would need to walk a while, so we parked next to a wooden section of a stone wall by the road. The location was very beautiful and we spent about thirty minutes taking pictures, gazing at the Pacific, and smelling flowers. As the five of us walked back to where we parked, I noticed, to my dismay, that the wooden part of the wall had moved and a man was standing next to our car talking on a cell phone. “Never mind! Here they are!” he shouted, shoving his phone into his pocket. I said, “Uh oh.” “You can’t imagine how you have messed me up!” the man screamed. The wooden part of the wall was an entrance to his property on the ocean. A brown truck was parked in front of our car, unable to get to the road. It was evident we had picked a bad parking place and this man was letting us have it. “I’ve had this appointment for weeks and you made me miss it!” We all said we were sorry as we slid into the car, but our humble apologies would not appease. I didn’t have an idea what to do until I heard him shout, “You’re going to have to give me at least $100 for this!!!” I looked at Susan in the driver’s seat and said, “I don’t have $100, let’s just leave.” One of our children heartily agreed from the back seat, but Susan said, “I have $100 in my purse in the trunk.” I didn’t argue with her as she got out of the car. As the man continued to yell, using bad language and threatening lawsuits, Susan reached out her hand with five twenty dollar bills. The closing remarks of this nightmare were a little humorous. As the man snatched the money, he shouted, “I’ve had walking pneumonia for two weeks!” Susan, with a slightly raised voice, replied, “Well, my husband has terminal cancer.” He looked down at me in the car and all I could think to say was, “Merry Christmas.”

    As we drove off, a heated discussion broke out in our family. One said we just wasted $100. Another said we should have driven away like I had originally suggested. Another said we should have run over the guy’s foot. I was still trying to figure out what we should have done. “I think Mom did the right thing. That guy really must have missed something important. Just think if we had an important place to go and when we raised our garage door someone had parked in our driveway blocking us. We’d be upset too!” My logic didn’t go too far with my children.

    That evening, our friend, Anna, and her niece, Ranata, prepared a delicious Brazilian meal. Still baffled by our encounter, I told them the story and asked the question I should have considered much earlier. “What do you think Jesus would have done?” “He wouldn’t have given him $100!” someone interjected. But as we considered our dilemma, we all realized that Jesus tells us exactly how to react in such uncomfortable situations. “Love your enemy. Pray for those that mistreat you. Bless those who curse you. If someone steals from you, give him a little more. If someone sues you, give him more than he asks.” How opposite Jesus lived! If we are going to follow Him we must be intentionally detached from our money, our possessions, and our egos! His heart became so apparent to me that I knew exactly what Jesus would have done. “I think Jesus would have healed that man.”

    There is a godly sorrow that comes when you realize you didn’t use an opportunity to say “yes” to the Lord. And who can redeem lost opportunities? Friday, we saw Taylor and his team off to the airport where they were to leave on their Cambodian outreach. Saturday, Christmas Eve, we had arranged for Susan and the girls to go on a snorkeling expedition. As we followed the directions to get to the place the boat docked, we discovered it was just a couple of blocks away from our disastrous parking place. As the girls prepared to get on the boat, I shared, “Since I’m not going with you guys, I think I’ll go find our friend.” Our youngest cried, “Dad, don’t you dare!” But I had already decided that our location was no coincidence. After waving bon voyage, I walked down the road and came to the wooden gate. No one seemed to be home as I walked along the wall. The several “Keep Out” and “No Trespassing” signs made me think I would probably not be welcome if anyone were home, but I decided to continue walking and praying. When I came to a spot near the ocean, at the rear of the wall, I could see three or four small houses on the property. Since there was still no sign of life, I decided it was time to leave. As I approached the gate, a brown truck drove up. My palms were sweaty as the familiar man jumped out to open the wooden gate. My heart started racing when I saw a giant black dog in the back of his truck. “Well, Lord, I guess this is an answer to prayer.” As the man turned around, we stood face to face. “Hello, friend”, I said. I tell you, he looked like he had seen a ghost. He started stammering and explaining how he really had missed an important doctor’s appointment that day and how angry he had been. “I know”, I said. “We felt terrible about it and I just wanted to tell you we were sorry.” In an ensuing, awkward moment of silence, I remembered I had a little souvenir in my pocket that I had bought at an outdoor market. It was a painted wooden gecko. I pulled it out and said, “Here’s a Christmas present.” Both hands shot up and he said, “No. I’m not going to take anything from you.” But I insisted and he meekly took the simple gift. “What are you doing now?” he asked. “Why don’t you come in for a while. My name is Peter and that’s my dog, Moose.”

    We visited on his porch for a half an hour, I guess. His great, great, great grandfather had moved to the big island from Italy in the 1860’s and the coast property had been in his family ever since. Peter was a fisherman and the pneumonia had kept him from work. I told him how much our son, Taylor, loved to fish and he offered to take him out. “But I always fish at night and it takes about two hours to get to the good spots.” I told him I was sorry he had been sick and he told me he was sorry I had cancer. He went into his house and came back with some blueprints showing future plans for his property. He hopes to fix up the four little houses and rent them to vacationers. I told him it sure was a beautiful spot on the ocean. “Leave me your address and I’ll send you a week’s free vacation when I get everything built.” I wrote down our address on the piece of paper he gave me. As I got ready to leave, I said, “You know my family follows Jesus and we really felt bad about the other day. I think Jesus would have healed you if He had been here. Do you mind if I pray for you before I go?” “I guess so”, he answered. As I prayed, I opened my eyes and noticed that Peter probably was not used to being in prayer settings. He was just walking around listening to me pray. When I came to the part where I prayed that God would heal him of his pneumonia, Peter looked up at the sky and shouted, “Yes, God, and heal my friend, Dana, too!”

    As I walked down the road to meet the girls, I couldn’t help but laugh out loud and praise our God in Heaven. Only He can bring about such changes. Animosity turned to peace; anger turned to laughter; hatred turned to friendship… and the man who cussed us out three days earlier was now praying for my health.

    “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” Luke 6:35-36

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